No One

Who is me?

Connoisseur of mystery
Mulder's my ticket
and Holmes my Jesus:
They're nothing like me.

Was once an athlete.
To be that big, can't
Run that far, that fast,
But you can't stop me.

And such a geek!
Damn near memorized
The Princess Bride.
I dream of Jedi.

An insufferable yinzer
From my six months in Pittsburgh.
Recovering Montanan:
Spent weeks in the woods
and Came back again.

When the mood strikes I write:
Profound, or trite.
To be honest, I go on
If the mood's right, or if it's wrong.

I'm a loser.  I told all those lies
To defend my own mind
From the truth I can't hide.

Who am I?
All those lies
Became the truth.
I am no one.
You wouldn't know better
If I asked you.